crazy makes me crave sugar

I am crazy. Insane. Certifiable. Seriously. I'm buying a house while my husband is gone. For 3 months. Like gone gone. Incommunicado. No talkie. I know people buy houses everyday, but not Michelle. Michelle has never bought a house before. The pressure of picking a house that both of us will like is beginning to wear on me. We've never disagreed on anything in that area. We have the same taste and the same ideas and stuff. But I start second guessing and thinking about things too hard. I actually wondered today if the granite in this one kitchen would be too shiny for him. Like he would care. It's supposed to be shiny. Who worries about shiny granite? Me. I do. Because I'm losing my ever-loving mind.

This is what happens when I'm all alone. I have lots of time to think and research and look and get a whole bunch of details that do not matter. TJ is my sounding board. I bounce things off him and think out loud. He grounds me and calms me down. I'm what you might call high-strung. I get really worked up about things and then I get all obsessive.

But find a house I will because we're trying to take advantage of the tax breaks for first time home buyers. Seeing as how he won't be back until mid-December, that job falls to me. Not to mention the packing and moving and all that junk. It's all me. Luckily his being in the military gives me a wide range of boys to choose from to do my bidding. Rally the troops, if you will. And rally I will. I have no shame. And no way to lift the couches by myself.

I'm also looking for a job. I think that contributes a big chunk of crazy to my crazy.

So my days have been filled with job hunting and house hunting. I'm trying to do a drive-by on all the houses. That sounded really bad. I'm not shooting anyone. I'm just trying to make sure I like the area before I drag our agent out to look at a house. I'm trying to get familiar with a new area and decide where we want to live. I found the PERFECT house the other day. Then we went to look at it. I would be scared to walk the dog. Who puts brand new houses in places like that??? Someone does, cause there it was. Its perfectness mocking me. Do I want the perfect house or do I want to live through my first night in my perfect house? It's a toss up...

I've done my house recon for the day, so I'm taking a break. I'm not allowing myself to look at jobs or houses online for the rest of the night. I need a reprieve.

TJ left Sunday for Ranger school. Yippee. It's going to be 3 fantastic months with zero communication (minus 2 weekends when he can use the phone between phases). Well, you can write letters, but I doubt he'll have a chance to actually write me. He'll be too busy being in the suck. Must be a boy thing because you couldn't pay me enough money to do something like that. He's been gone before. Once for 8 months (which is nothing compared to the 15 months that some people have to deal with), but talking on the phone makes a huge difference. The silence is deafening over here. On the bright side, I have a General Power of Attorney, which means I can do just about anything I want to in his name. This kind of power gives me a little bit of comfort. I like being the boss.

Anyway, my Spoonful word for today is crazy. I was having a hard time finding anything I just loved until I came upon these cards. So today my Spoonful is 5 things from the same shop. It's the "Crazy Love Card" series from Up Up Creative.

These cards crack me up. The two big ones are my favorite. I'm going to be such an angry pregnant lady. I will be the lady in the delivery room cursing a blue streak and screaming, "Look what you did to me!" at my husband. Forget my ice cream and it would be over for you. And have you ever tried natural peanut butter? Cause that shit is nasty. Like really, really nasty. I have yet to figure out how peanuts can be so delicious and natural peanut butter can be so utterly disgusting.

I love them because that's how I talk. I'm not all sappy and weird like some cards. If you ask me, this gets the sentiment across a lot better. And anyone who really knows me (i.e. my husband) would be fighting back tears if I gave them one of these. They made me smile and laugh a little and I couldn't pick just one, so I thought I'd just use them all. Cause I'm the boss and I can do that.

And as an added bonus, the products are all eco-friendly!

A few random things before I go:

I saw a sign on base yesterday that said "Tank Crossing" and it had a picture of a tank. It was incredibly awesome. Next time I'm on that road I'll remember to slow down and take a picture.

Did you know that the human eye has more visible sclera (white part of your eye) than any other mammal? I had never really thought about it, but we so do. Most other mammals only have the colored part of their eye showing. Craziness. Really random, but I thought it was interesting.

Everyone must try Planters NUT-rition Energy Mix. It's got almonds, honey roasted sesame sticks, peanuts, dark chocolate covered soy nuts, walnuts, and pecans. The soy nuts are superb, but the whole mix is way yummy. I don't feel so bad when I eat the whole container of something healthy while I sit in front of the TV.

Ok, that's all. I promise to be around more. Thanks to those of you who noticed I was gone and even more thanks to those who actually missed me :)

xoxo